Laxmi Narayan Tripathi—a voice growing from the margins of India’s social, religious, and gender structures—has put into words the vocal cry of a silenced community through her autobiography “Red Lipstick: The Men in My Life”.
Calling ‘Red Lipstick’ merely an autobiography would be an injustice. This book is a movement, a cry against the silence that Indian society had imposed on the transgender community. Laxmi’s life journey is not only woven from her body, but also from her soul and struggles. She describes her childhood experiences, family environment, suffocation in school and college, social scorn, sexual harassment, and finally the process of accepting herself so sensitively and openly that the reader gets emotionally attached.
Laxmi Narayan Tripathi is a classical dancer, and this art is an important part of her life. The book highlights how she expresses her femininity through dance, beauty, makeup, and especially red lipstick. For her, lipstick is not a cosmetic but a symbol of acceptance, rebellion, and self-respect.
“Gender is nothing but an unromantic box.” This line is the essence of her statement. She considers gender to be a social bond and keeps her existence beyond that bond. This view of hers also provides a deep philosophical discussion in the book.
The subtitle of the book, “The Men in My Life” makes it clear that it is not just an autobiography but also an analysis of the role of men in her life. Lover, friend, exploiter, helper and opponent—men come in her life in all these forms. Lakshmi has portrayed these relationships with complete honesty, neither does she glorify herself nor does she prove any man to be a demon.
“I am the epitome of sluthood—I can be the ultimate seductress, and I can also suddenly become otherworldly, divine and naive. I’m like a serpent, slippery”.
This quote is a candid introduction to her complex and multifaceted female identity. She is also a lover, is also considered a prostitute, also becomes a mother, and also a saint. She is in all forms and does not hesitate to accept them.
Laxmi Narayan Tripathi has not only shared her experiences but also given a cultural depth to her identity by referring to Indian mythological characters like Ardhanarishwar, Shikhandi, Brihannala, etc. She says that this land has always respected diverse gender identities, but modern society has marginalized them.
The language of the book is emotive, simple, but poignant. This autobiography, written in collaboration with Pooja Pande, flows like a novel. Every chapter opens a new layer and forces the reader to think.
Laxmi Narayan Tripathi’s autobiography Red Lipstick: The Men in My Life, is a candid and in-depth account of her relationships with men. These are not just love stories, but stories of experiences at an emotional, mental, and social level – at times drenched in love, at times soaked in betrayal, and at times a vehicle of self-realization.
Here, I give you a summary of the major types of men in Laxmi’s life and her love stories with them:
- First Love – Innocent and Breaking
Her first love story is from her college days, when she felt emotional attraction towards a man for the first time. It was a hidden love, lived with fear, because she could not express her love openly due to the fear of society and family. But that man never accepted her publicly.
Laxmi writes: “He would hold me in the dark, kiss me in silence, but vanish in daylight”.
- Those who just used her
Many men in Lakshmi’s life played with her emotions. They tried to get close to her only for a physical relationship or used her as a means to satisfy their lust.
Laxmi writes: “Men loved my exoticism, not my essence. They wanted the mystery, not the person.”
- The lover who made false promises
There was a man who came into her life who kept promising to marry her, stayed in a relationship with her for years, but eventually married another woman. Lakshmi was devastated by this deception.
Laxmi writes: “He promised me sindoor but gifted me silence.”
- Those who wanted her ‘secretly’
Many men loved Lakshmi but could not accept her as their wife or girlfriend due to the fear of society. They wanted to keep her a ‘secret’.
Laxmi writes: “I was always the midnight call, never the morning walk.”
- A man who accepted her as ‘Lakshmi’
There is a character in the book who accepted Lakshmi in all her femininity, respected her like a goddess. But this relationship also parted ways with time.
Laxmi writes: “He looked at me not as a man or a woman, but as a soul-burning and brilliant.”
Red Lipstick: The Men in My Life is more than an autobiography. It is a challenge to society, an inspiration to the young generation, and a milestone for the literary world. It is a call for those voices that were silenced for centuries. Laxmi Narayan Tripathi has proved by presenting himself boldly that identity is not in the body, but in the soul. This book should be read by everyone who wants to understand and accept diversity.
About the Reviewer
Author Laxmi Jaiswal is a researcher of Hindi literature, a writer, and a reflective thinker on social issues. She has written extensively on marginalized communities, feminist discourse, and transgender identity. This review has been written by her to promote an inclusive outlook in society.
